Sunday, March 19, 2006

Sick Days

Well, this has pretty much been my view of the world this weekend. I've caught something that's just knocking me out. I'm sleeping, drinking lots of water and trying to relax. I've got a lot going on right now, including my coaching certification exam in less than 2 weeks, which is why I feel I absolutely cannot be sick right now, and which is likely precisely why I am.

You know, this year was the first time in my life I realized I have a finite amount of energy. Isn't that crazy? I know money and time are limited resources. But I just figured I could plunge ahead forever. And if I couldn't, well, that was some weakness in me, something I needed to solve and make better. Um, wrong, Jamie. It's as simple as this - your body needs sleep, your mind needs a break, your spirit needs to breathe. Oh, yeah. I guess I forgot.

In the past couple of years, I've been doing much better in this area. It's really made a difference to shift the way that I view caring for myself. I used to see it as something that got in the way of the things that I really want to do. What? I have to sleep? Come on, I just want to finish this painting. What? I need to eat? Come on, I just want to... You get the picture. But now I see self-care as a way of being really loving with myself and of honouring the gift of my body. I'm a very in-my-body person. I love my body. I don't mean I admire it, but rather I love it like I love my family, warts and all (well, truthfully, if I had warts I'd try to figure out how to get rid of them... okay, this metaphor isn't working out how I planned).

I am thankful for all the gifts of my body. So much of how I enjoy the world comes through it. I relish my sense of touch. I like to get my hands into everything. When I see something, I want to know how it feels. Affectionate touch is a blessing. One of the reasons I studied Reiki is because I believe that we aren't touched enough in our lives. I am so thankful for my sight. I love colour and texture and seeing those I love. I love exploring the visual arts. When I had a problem with my eye this summer, it was so scary. It was a real reminder of how precious this sense is to me. I'm thankful for the pleasure of hearing my cats purr, my sister laugh and the wind in the trees. And what more can be said about the joys of raspberries and french toast and a great cup of coffee? And the scent of spring, my husband's cologne, blooming hyacinth? And I love what I experience kinesthetically. Moving makes me feel alive. Exploring shapes and patterns and images through the body excites my imagination and expresses what I feel in my soul. All of these wonders are gifts that I can only appreciate through my body.

And in return, I do what I can to appreciate it, whether that's making sure I eat my veggies or treat myself to a visit to the spa. For now it means letting the world stop for just a little bit, so that my tired body can catch up.


chest of drawers said...

I hope your up again soon...on the other hand, enjoy lying around, gathering thoughts, connecting with your body and it´s needs. We often don´t take care of our bodies enough, probably because we don´t like ours as much as you like yours - I´m happy for you that you feel great in your skin and love and appreciate your body the way you do!

liz elayne said...

This image of caring for and loving the body - this is so good. I honor that you are doing this and appreciate the reminder to do the same.
Take care of yourself. Again I say, take care of yourself. Keep resting, drinking water, breathing deeply. Sending healthy energy your way!

megg said...

I loved this post! (I say that SO much to you!!:) You are a deep deep inspiration to me. I have a real appreciation for my senses but not for the body that gives them to me but I am working on that - I think of you whenever I am being unkind to my body, I remember that you take such joy in yours and try to change the way I am thinking. Thank you for that gift!!!

I'm so sorry that you aren't feeling well. Take the time to get better, you need to be strong for your upcoming exams. Take good care of you! I'm sending love and healthy thoughts! xoox

Sacred Suzie said...

I read the other day that the body speaks in whispers and if you don't listen for it, soon it'll start screaming! I'm so sorry for the timing of your body saying, I'm going to make you take care of me.

I love how you describe your relationship with your body, it shows what a sensitive and sensual person you really are.