21 Day Challenge ~ Day 2

I'm a little behind. It's actually day 4 of the 21 Day Challenge, but I'll catch up! My challenge is to ask for what I want. On Day 2 (and Day 3, really) I asked myself to do what I could to get a good night's sleep. I watched my caffeine. I gave myself some quiet time before bed. I took my 15-minute chair and stare time. I tried to stay at ease. On both days I was able to sleep a bit later than my regular schedule allows. I knew that being rested and at ease was the best gift I could give myself to prepare for my exam.

Breaking Rules & Asking for What I want

I'm in the middle of my big coaching certification exam so I'm tossing all the rules! I'm not worrying about anything else I would normally do right now, and I'm going to share with you Day 3 of my 21-Day Challenge - Asking for What I Want sans art journal!

I started the written portion of my exam at 12:00 and finished the last question at 6:30! I did take breaks including having some lunch and going for a walk looking for sprouts in my garden. I feel great about the exam. I felt so prepared and like "wow, I know this stuff." It was an awesome feeling. I hope I'll feel as positive tomorrow after the oral portion!

Now, I am a huge believer in celebration. I've got dinner out with my husband and sister tomorrow to celebrate finishing the exam. And I will have champagne in the fridge chilling for when I am officially a CPCC (certified professional co-active coach), but I hadn't thought about how to celebrate tonight. So here's where the "asking for what I want" came in. I called my husband.

"Honey, could you pick up some ice cream on the way home today?
"Sure, what kind?"
"Um, I don't know. Nothing too chocolatey. Oh, I don't like maple walnut. I love pralines and cream, but they won't have that... Um... I don't know. Something creamy. I know, Shannon mentioned coffee ice cream last night. How about that?"
"Okay."

I hang up the phone and I'm thinking, man, how lame was that? I couldn't even come up with--
Wait! I know!
I called him back immediately.

"Honey, I want you to pick up French vanilla ice cream and Hershey's chocolate sauce. I've already got sprinkles at home. We are having sundaes to celebrate!"

Yahoo! Asking for what you want can be sweet!

Wish me luck tomorrow :)

Self Portrait Tuesday ~ Time ~ Week 4

My Self Portrait Tuesday Contributions for Time have been a picture each day of something I appreciate. I've really enjoyed the process and received such positive feedback, that I think I might continue this process. Here's what I appreciated this week.

Tuesday: By Tuesday I was sick of being sick. Luckily I was better enough that I could spend some of my time reading, and I had the joy of being able to finish this beautiful and compelling book, The Dance by Oriah Mountain Dreamer. This will give you a sense of it:

"If I want to live my ability to be fully present and compassionate, my ability to be with it all - the joy and the sorrow - I must find the ways, the people, the places, the practices that support me in being all I truly am. I must cultivate ways of being that let me feel the warmth of encouragement against my heart when it is weary. I must be fiercely and compassionately honest with myself about those choices and actions that are inconsistent with my deepest nature and soul's desires. I must find the song lines that run through my life, the melodies that remind me of what I really am and call me gently back to acting on this knowing. I must learn how to dance."

Wednesday: I absolutely love this cd. I heard this band years ago opening for Beth Orton. I thought they were spellbinding and ordered the cd. The other day my sister Suzie asked me if I was singing. Not often, but recently when I have, it's been Hem.

Thursday: What I'm enthusiastic about here is the little bird you can see in the bottom left if you look closely. One of the things I looked forward to when moving to a house was to hear birds. Since we've lived here, every spring a bird couple had made their home in our eaves. We hear the babies long before we see them. And our cats enjoy the excitement from the window very much. It was nice to see this little guy.

Friday: On Friday I had to go to the doctor and believe it or not this is the view from the little change room at the office. It was a bit of a stressful, but for a brief moment I looked out this window and felt incredibly calm. I enjoyed the quiet of the morning.

Saturday: As I mentioned in my Downtown Living post, we had a great time in a cool 'hood looking at an apartment for Shannon and ending up in one of my very favourite restaurants eating wonderful french toast and enjoying exceptional coffee. This was a real highlight.

Sunday: On Sunday I finally had some time to study and prepare for the written portion of my coaching exam, which I am going to do tomorrow. It was a great experience as I went over all the different concepts and theories that I have been working with over the past several years. It made very clear to me how immersed in this work I have been and how very much I have already learned. I feel so grateful for all that I have received from my training, my colleagues, my clients and coaching.

Monday: My datebook, I love my datebook. One year I actually tried to adapt to another kind that offered a bit more colour, a bit more style. After a week, I went back to my faithful book that provides both a month-at-a-glance and a weekly schedule (which I also use for my to-do list). And though I am waxing poetic about my datebook, the significance really was that I have made arrangements in my schedule so that as of June 1 I will have more time for my coaching, my art and my life and I am thrilled.

21 Day Challenge

I decided to jump into the 21 Day Challenge. It's based on the idea that it takes 21 days to make/break a habit. For 21 days you establish or rid yourself of a habit, and you get to go through it with others and create an art journal as you go. If you're interested, I don't believe it's ever too late to join. You can choose any habit you'd like to work on. For me I saw a great opportunity to take part in something, create a habit that would have a positive impact on my life and start an art journal, which is Number 21 on my 101 List. Number 21 is now officially in progress.


My 21-Day Challenge: To ask for what I want

This may be asking for what I want from someone, from myself or from the Universe.

Day 1: One of my goals over the next year is to continue to lessen the amount of hours I spend at what I call my "day job" as I step more and more into my coaching and creative work. Recently I asked if I could lower my hours as of June 1, and my boss had requested I stay until July 15. I really hashed it out, and I was frankly a bit nervous about putting myself first and going in and saying, "Actually, I'm afraid I need to stick with the original date." But today I did it.

101 Things in 1001 days - update 2

Start date: March 5, 2006
End date: December 1, 2008

I can't cross anything off my 101 Things in 1001 Days list this week, but I want to notice starts, progress and commitment. And one thing I forgot to mention at the outset is that on the off chance that I don't complete all 101 tasks in 1001 days, I will donate $2 per task to the United Way for each undone task. I'm not doing this to serve as motivation. But I do know that unfinished business weighs you down, so I wanted to create a positive way to provide closure at the end. This way the end will be full of positivity no matter what happens!

These are all in process but not completed

1. Pay off my student loan

This week I made a student loan payment that was half again as large as I have to. I also came into a lump sum of cash that I've put aside for this. I'm making some transitions over the summer, and so I'm keeping this money in case I need a safety net. But if I don't, the whole deal is going towards paying down my loan. It's great motivation.

6. Fix the vent in the kitchen and 13. Finish 2 kitchen windows

We have an appointment with a contractor to cost out these and a few other jobs. Hopefully these will be done over the next couple of weeks.

17. Invite 6 people over for dinner, starting with Mom

I have invited my Mom over for Easter dinner.

18. Leave my day job

This is a few step process. I have asked to go to fewer days a week, and we are negotiating when that will begin.

23. Take 100 Nia classes

Since my last update I have taken 1 class. I'm now at 2/100.

24. Have my taxes up to date

We have an appointment with our tax consultant next Sunday.

25. Take my vitamins every day for a month

I started this on March 20 and will go to April 20.

37. Get new glasses

I have my prescription and I have done 2 shops for these but have yet to decide on frames.

59. Become a certified co-active coach

I will complete the written portion of my exam this Wednesday and am scheduled for the oral portion this Thursday. Then, I just wait to hear how I did.

101. Give myself 15 minutes of chair and stare time for a month

I began this on March 21 and will continue until April 21. This is really about giving myself 15 minutes of quiet time with my own thoughts every day. Fridays are a really challenging day for me to find the time to do this. I'm considering giving myself a Friday chair and stare at a coffee shop. Though I find it hard to actually take the time to do it, I do find it's a great decompressor.

Downtown Living

When my husband and I bought our house in the east end of Toronto, the shift in location was a big deal. We are a 5-minute walk from the subway and a 15-minute subway ride to the centre of the city, but to us it felt like the edge of the earth. There is a lot I have come to love about living here - being close to a grocery store, being dangerously close convenience store, having our own laundry and mostly having space and having a garden. I still go downtown to work and to the movies, to dinner and to shop, all with ease. But oh, there's so much I miss.

My sister is looking for an apartment, and she is committed to being downtown. Today we went to see a place and wow, it was clear that certain neighbourhoods just feel like home. I've been thinking about what makes that so for me. Here's what I noticed from our outing today.

An ideal home is within a walk of the subway, preferably also along at least one, maybe even 2 streetcar routes. Being able to come home easily and safely from a variety of directions makes me feel like I'm in the heart of things rather than the outskirts. Also knowing that at night you will see people out and about, walking home from work or leaving for the club or walking their dog, makes it feel safe and alive and like people actually live there.

There's a certain kind of architecture that says "home in the city" to me. I'll have to take a picture of that at some point. The houses are sometimes in excellent shape, sometimes well-worn, but they don't feel forgotten or rundown. These homes are loaded with memories and have seen plenty of life. On the inside they're usually rather quirky and require creativity and a bit of work, especially in terms of storage. Many houses are divided into rental units and everyone recycles.

You can live on a quiet street with trees and gardens and within a 5- or 10-minute walk there is a grocery store, a bank, a book store, a music store, a movie theatre, several restaurants and more. In the little section we walked through on College there was also an art gallery and a millinery. And when you walk around you hear all different languages. Someone walks down the street and bumps into a buddy and starts talking Portuguese. And then a woman gets out of her car and talks to her child in Polish.

When we stopped for brunch at one of my favourite spots, it really drew into focus what I miss most, though it's hard to put a name to it. I sat there feeling so at home over exceptional coffee and french toast with raspberries. The restaurant feels special but is relaxed and affordable. The walls are red and the room is full of dark wood. There's a fabulously tacky elephant lamp in the window. It's brunch on a Saturday and the hostess is wearing a chocolate-coloured sequined shirt. I think every member of the waitstaff has a tattoo. The guys beside us were talking about the film they just finished. In the washroom area there were tons of postcards and posters advertising theatre, dance, independent film, yoga and belly-dancing class.

Writing that I realize that part of what I'm missing is the part of me that belongs there - the me that's involved in a creative project, that works on her own schedule, that dresses up not down, that loves to chat about ideas and possibilities, that's passionate and engaged, smart and playful, the me that lives downtown.

Poetry Thursday ~ The Tulip Girl

This is my first offering in Liz's Poetry Thursday. I used to write poetry all the time and then not for years. A while ago, this poem found it's way into my head and onto the page. With the feeling of spring, I thought I'd share it. I hope you like it.

The Tulip Girl

This morning,
I was the tulip girl.

Walking to the subway,
carrying tulips,
I heard a bongo-playing streetkid call,
"Share some love.
Share some love."

I held the tulips to my face.
They smelled like fresh peas.

I was late for workand all was right with the world.

Winter Trees

Thank you Claudia for introducing me to Picasa. That's how I made this photo collage as easy as pie. I got excited about making a collage that I looked through all of my pictures wondering, what do I take pictures of? And I realized one of the things I love, love, love is trees.

I am so excited about moving into spring. I am completely ready for it, but I do notice that one of the things I'll miss is winter trees. I love seeing the complexities of their branches, the strength of their structure. I enjoy the naked intimacy of a tree with no leaves. I look out my window and wonder, what approach would I take to climbing that tree? I think about how no trees are structured the way we all drew them as children.

And now I know that soon there will be a day when we will notice a couple of buds and within a few days more, everything will have miraculously exploded into green. And the trees will have their privacy once more.

Chair & Stare

One of the goals I've set myself for my 101 Things in 1001 Days is 15-minutes a day of "chair and stare" time for a month. I started today. Actually, I started on Wednesday and then quickly fell of the chair. So I've started again today.

I read an article ages ago that said Picasso found chair and stare time absolutely crucial to his creative process. I searched for a reference for this today, with no luck whatsoever! Now the key, of course, isn't being in a chair. It's taking that time to just be with your own thoughts, look out at the world, experience the moment. When I was a girl, I did this all the time, barefoot and looking in the grass in our backyard or lying on my back and looking at the sky.

Now I find this a real challenge. I start making lists in my head, planning, organizing. I get bored. I get restless. I get tired. I thinking about all the things I should be doing. And that's why now, during this super busy period, I have decided to take on this task, to give myself some downtime, to see what shows up, to see where my mind meanders.

Self Portrait Tuesday ~ Time ~ Week 3

As I look at my pictures for Self Portrait Tuesday this week, I really see how much has been about Spring this week. I hope you enjoy tracking it's arrival with me.

And on a tech note, if anyone can tell me how they make their little photo collages, if you do it any way other than PhotoShop, I would really appreciate it.

Tuesday: This is the OSHO zen card that I picked for this day. She represents the Queen of Wands in a traditional deck and that is the card that most often represents me in a reading. When this card shows up, I know it's a day where I'm going to feel like me, a day to just be myself. On this particular day getting this card reminded me to be courageous in asking for what I want and creating the life I want to be living. I felt energized, empowered and full of life.

Wednesday: Those are my crocuses sprouting! I've been a little worried that they're showing up too soon, but my Mom assures me that they'll hang in there. Last year in this tiny patch of dirt at the front of our house not a single bulb that I planted sprouted. So I am just thrilled to see these 3 little signs of life!

Thursday: During the week, I generally wake up at 6:45 am. It feels like forever that I've woken up in the pitch black and searched for my clothes in the gloom. But when I woke up on Thursday this is what I saw, a little bit of light signaling that spring is really on its way.

Friday: A very cool tradition that I have for Fridays is that I hang out with my sister, Shannon. Our night really begins at noon, when we officially start our email countdown to when the workday is going to be over. The best part is that it's dedicated time to hang out together, and we're totally relaxed about our plans. This Friday we went to our local Chinese food spot and chatted over dinner.

Saturday: On Saturday I bought myself this wonderful Frog Prince to put in our garden. I love subtle touches of whimsy. I can't wait to find him a new home.

Sunday: By Saturday afternoon I had really come down with something. I slept through most of the weekend. On Sunday I decided that I needed to get some fresh air, so I invited my husband to go for a walk with me in the backyard. Now, if you 've seen our backyard that's pretty funny because it's the size of a postage stamp. Still it's something we often do together, looking to see what's changed, what's growing and how things are doing. (If you'd asked us downtowners 2 years ago if we would ever have done such a thing we would have laughed heartily)

And when we went out we found these little sprouts on our honeysuckle. I have a special spot in my heart for this plant, so much so that I bent my garden rules for it. I'm, well, I'm pretty particular. And I've been really, really keen on having a garden of mostly green and white with the odd pink or blue highlight. I am wild for white flowers and I find the white and green incredibly peaceful (unlike my Mom who finds it anemic, hehe) Well, this orange/red honeysuckle was bought for the front of the house, and when it didn't work there I was absolutely stuck about what to do. But my husband and I had ended up liking it so much, we decided to find it a special spot as the only such colour statement in the garden.

Monday: And Monday, Claudia absolutely made my day with this beautiful package of treats! I was feeling kind of miserable and wondering what the heck I would appreciate today and then this arrived! Isn't it magnificent? Claudia made me this beautiful mini quilt that says "Magic" on it! And there's Liebstockl seeds to plant in my garden - yay! From the picture it looks like it will have absolutely lovely leaves. And a happy bookmark, which already has a home in a book! And even one of Laini's Ladies. (Laini, your ladies are beautiful!) What treasures! I feel spoiled. I feel blessed. And I feel very, very grateful. Thank you, Claudia.

Sick Days

Well, this has pretty much been my view of the world this weekend. I've caught something that's just knocking me out. I'm sleeping, drinking lots of water and trying to relax. I've got a lot going on right now, including my coaching certification exam in less than 2 weeks, which is why I feel I absolutely cannot be sick right now, and which is likely precisely why I am.

You know, this year was the first time in my life I realized I have a finite amount of energy. Isn't that crazy? I know money and time are limited resources. But I just figured I could plunge ahead forever. And if I couldn't, well, that was some weakness in me, something I needed to solve and make better. Um, wrong, Jamie. It's as simple as this - your body needs sleep, your mind needs a break, your spirit needs to breathe. Oh, yeah. I guess I forgot.

In the past couple of years, I've been doing much better in this area. It's really made a difference to shift the way that I view caring for myself. I used to see it as something that got in the way of the things that I really want to do. What? I have to sleep? Come on, I just want to finish this painting. What? I need to eat? Come on, I just want to... You get the picture. But now I see self-care as a way of being really loving with myself and of honouring the gift of my body. I'm a very in-my-body person. I love my body. I don't mean I admire it, but rather I love it like I love my family, warts and all (well, truthfully, if I had warts I'd try to figure out how to get rid of them... okay, this metaphor isn't working out how I planned).

I am thankful for all the gifts of my body. So much of how I enjoy the world comes through it. I relish my sense of touch. I like to get my hands into everything. When I see something, I want to know how it feels. Affectionate touch is a blessing. One of the reasons I studied Reiki is because I believe that we aren't touched enough in our lives. I am so thankful for my sight. I love colour and texture and seeing those I love. I love exploring the visual arts. When I had a problem with my eye this summer, it was so scary. It was a real reminder of how precious this sense is to me. I'm thankful for the pleasure of hearing my cats purr, my sister laugh and the wind in the trees. And what more can be said about the joys of raspberries and french toast and a great cup of coffee? And the scent of spring, my husband's cologne, blooming hyacinth? And I love what I experience kinesthetically. Moving makes me feel alive. Exploring shapes and patterns and images through the body excites my imagination and expresses what I feel in my soul. All of these wonders are gifts that I can only appreciate through my body.

And in return, I do what I can to appreciate it, whether that's making sure I eat my veggies or treat myself to a visit to the spa. For now it means letting the world stop for just a little bit, so that my tired body can catch up.

Tarot Coaching

I was so touched and inspired by people's comments yesterday. Thank you. The interest and positive feedback around the Tarot Coaching has really added to my enthusiasm and momentum in developing this process. I have been a student of the tarot for years. The picture above is a card from the OSHO Zen tarot deck. I pull a card from this deck every day to seek insight. I find the pictures beautiful and compelling, and the message is always one of guidance and acceptance. I do not use this deck to do readings for others, nor would I recommend it for someone learning the tarot. It can be rather untraditional.

I've had the great good fortune to have wonderful people in my life be test clients for the Tarot Coaching sessions that I am developing and that I hope to launch in May. It is a highly personalized experience between the client, the tarot and me, the coach. Sessions tend to be about 2 hours and involve us going through a reading together. We put down a spread and then look at the cards for insight, direction and inspiration.

Tarot Coaching is not the passive experience that readings generally are. I will never look at the cards and say, "A new job opportunity is coming up, and you should take it." Instead, I'd ask you to look at the relevant card and tell me what you notice. Like right now, if you look at the card at the top, what stands out to you? What's the first thing that draws your eye? When you think of that image, what does it remind you of? How does that resonate with what's currently going on in your life?

I would also share with you what I notice, and ask if that has any resonance for you. So, for example, tonight I look at this card and am really drawn to the flower that's on the forehead. In fact what I notice is that it almost seems to be moving, swirling. I might ask you then, "What's swirling around in your mind?" And I would also share with you the traditional meaning of this card. In this case, this card is the ace of pentacles. It always represents a beginning, sometimes an opportunity, and generally in the field of career or finances. We'd discuss what that might be pointing to in your life.

All of this would also be done in the context of whether this card represents the present, the past, what you're moving into, who you are, what you're afraid of, what you're dreaming about, etc. We also look at the trends in the cards, the themes, the colours, the repeated images. This really provides lots of opportunity for self-reflection, exploration and honest discussion. And we take our time with each card, sitting with it until we feel we've received the message it is there to share.

And a crucial piece is that I work with you to figure out what you want to do with this information. This isn't designed to be 2-hours of entertainment, though I'm sure we'll have fun together! It's really meant to deepen your understanding of your self and your situation and also to help support you in incorporating what you've learned into your life in a meaningful way.

Why I absolutely love this work is the sacredness of creating a space and time for someone to encounter themselves, and with the tarot, you will always encounter your self. As the Tarot coach, I have the honour of holding the space, of facilitating the experience, of witnessing this magical encounter.

Self Portrait Tuesday ~ Time ~ Week 2

Time is elastic - sometimes it seems tight and small and sometimes it seems to extend on and on. When I look at last Tuesday's picture, it seems forever ago, a distant memory. What makes this week seem so much longer than the last? Did more happen? Less? I don't know. What I do know is that these are the 7 moments that I wanted to appreciate this week. That's the perspective I'm holding for this month's Time assignment for Self Portrait Tuesday.

Tuesday: On Monday I lost my grey hooded wool sweater. Now, I know that may not sound like a big deal, but this sweater has tried to keep me warm for the past 2 years in an office that is painfully cold. The cold has been so bad that people wear jackets and even fingerless gloves while working at their computers. I've been surprised at the emotional impact of being that cold for that long. It makes me angry. It makes me feel impoverished. This sweater has been my armour against that. At the restaurant where I thought I'd lost it, the woman behind the counter hadn't seen it. I hung my head and bought a coffee. As I was adding sugar, she came up to me with a big smile and asked, "Is this it?" Yay! Me and my grey sweater - reunited at last!

Wednesday: This is where I take my favourite Nia class. Isn't it inviting? I love the energy of this room. I love the gentle light and the wooden floors. I love they symmetry of the windows. I find the people in the class are generally kind. I like the neighbourhood that the building is in. I like being here. I like dancing here. I'm so thankful to be able to spend my Wednesday mornings moving in this space

Thursday: I had such a good time going to see the Russian film Night Watch with my sister and my husband. This picture is of the preview, and you can just see Shannon's shiny boots there on the lower left. People seem to either really like this film or really, well, not. Count me among those who liked it. I was caught up in the film. I was fascinated by the visuals. The sound was great. It really caught me. I'm so glad we got to see it.

Friday: On Friday I had such a nice time going out to lunch with Dan at a local favourite spot. It had been an absolutely rotten day, so it was a real treat to have good company, good food and good ambience. And the icing on a cake was this new addition to the room: a gorgeous chandelier! Now, I am a real nut for chandeliers. I love them. I love the formality. I love the sparkle. I love the sense of occasion. One drawback of our house is that it has no dining room. But despite that and the fact that Justin is anti-chandelier, he bought me a lovely little chandelier-like sconce for my studio. Now all I have to do is put it up.

Saturday: The joy of Saturday was blue skies, sunshine and warmth. It only lasted the weekend, but the promise of spring was there, and I loved it. It's my very favourite season and always has been. The smell of spring makes me smile. I start looking for the tips for the crocuses that are surely on their way. This year I planted them and daffodils and tulips and hyacinth, all of which I hope to see this spring. I've been working on creating a garden with a palette of mostly green and white with some pink and purple infusions. I would love to have a calm space to recharge. This sky sure gave me a bit of a perk up.

Sunday: I have been developing interactive tarot coaching sessions. I've had some awesome practice clients support me in this endeavour, including this Sunday. This is not their reading because that's their own special personal information. I've been amazed at how intense and fruitful these experiences have been. I am really excited to be getting to a place where I can share this with clients. The tarot is so evocative and this experience is really about looking at little works of art and considering how they might apply to your life. It feels like such a blessing to experience this with people.

Monday: This is not a terribly glamorous photo, but I have to tell you a long, hot shower at the end of the day was what I appreciated most about yesterday. I love having a nighttime shower, washing off all the stress and worry of the day. I love slipping between the sheets, smelling fresh and clean and ready for sweet dreams to arrive.

Inspire Me Thursday: Sense-less Art

Life has been really busy lately, and I have gotten all out of kilter with the creative activities I've wanted to partake in. So it's so exciting to actually have done this week's Inspire Me Thursday project. Yay! You can post any time before Thursday, though I feel all discombobulated posting a Thursday title on a Monday, hehe.

So the project this week was to create a piece of art without using your senses. I started with a background that I had painted already. Then I grabbed a magazine and with my eyes closed turned to a page. All the pages feel the same so my sense of touch couldn't guide me. I tore out the page. From the first page I tore out a shape without looking and then I put it on the background. From then on I followed the process of with eyes closed picking a page and tearing it out. I then opened my eyes and tore out the first thing that caught my eye and found it a home on the paper. This vibrant lady is the result.

I had a lot of fun doing this project. It was freeing not to consider the final product. It was also fascinating to notice when I wanted to cheat. It always happened when I'd start to get an idea of what I wanted to happen next. I'd think, "Oh, I really want to put.... here" and then I wanted to look for it instead of just trusting that something interesting and fun was going to show up, something that my intuition would see. Hmm, I think there's a lesson in that.

101 Things in 1001 Days - update

This week I was able to knock item #76, "Take the cats to the vet," off of my 101 list. Unfortunately that's because we had the rather disturbing experience of coming home the other night and finding drops of blood throughout the first floor of the house. It took us a little while to realize that the problem was one of the cats, and with two cats it's almost impossible to tell which one has a the issue unless it's something visible. So the next day we were at the vet with both cats and lots of worries.

As it turns out both cats had a full range of tests and are just fine. Blessed be! When something like this happens, the world stops until you are assured of their health. And it draws into sharp relief how deeply we love our furry family members.

Our beautiful grey Bascha is 16 years old. She's a little bit of a grump, (well, to be honest, she's a bitch sometimes, as Jinx will tell you), but if you're in her good books, she's as loving as they come. Her instant attachment to Justin was a little embarrassing (I told her to hold out at least for a bit) but also reinforced how special he was. I adopted her from the Humane Society when she was 3. She was so small everyone thought she was a kitten. She had no fur on her haunches from a flea allergy, and they'd decided to stop investing in her medical care. I couldn't resist her. She was so beautiful and immediately and insistently brushed her head up against the cage for cuddles. Her fur is almost silver-tipped, and it makes her appear luminescent. I call her my moon cat.

And then our baby, Jinx. Well, she still seems like a baby to me but she's 11 years old! She's a scaredy cat and, well, not terribly clever, but she makes me giggle and smile. She's a goofball. She'll find a way to squish herself into a box 1/10 her size, and I learned from her what that cat sound in cartoons Pfzzzt! really sounds like! Jinx was also a Humane Society cat. I had gone with my sister just to look at an Abyssinian cat they had because he was so beautiful. Shannon said, "What about this one?" I literally gasped when I saw this little orange boo. Until that moment I had no intention of bringing home another cat. At that moment, I couldn't resist. I had about $25 to my name. I didn't know how I was going to manage. After the interview process, I sat there with little Jinx in that cardboard box and said to Shannon, "I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't be doing this." But I did and I can't imagine life without her.

So my wonderful girls went to the vet this week. They are fine, healthy and up to date with their healthcare. And I am now at 100/101 - YAY!

Oh, and I went to 1 Nia class, so only 99 left to go!

Tag of 3

Thank you, Meg, for this tag. I just loved the questions. I've really enjoyed reading people's responses. They are so soulful. It's taken a few days to get to it, as always. I think I just have to accept that with so much going on my blogging is a bit erratic.

3 things you wish for (just for you):

• To go to art school
• To find my people
• To be who I am in the world

3 things you would do to/for you if there was no one to judge you (or if you had the guts.)

1. I would take a month off and not do anything that looks like work. I would catch up with friends, go to galleries, read, sleep in, go to the movies in the afternoon, paint, go on photography jaunts, journal at a coffee shop.
2. I would go to art school.
3. I would dance naked in the moonlight.

3 bad habits you have.

1. I put off connecting with people if it has to be done over the phone. I have a phone phobia.
2. I pile up papers instead of finding them a home.
3. I leave my glass of water all over the house. I used to leave glasses of water all over the house but after the protestations of those who wash the dishes, I bought myself 1 beautiful water glass and use only that. But I still leave it all over the place.

3 insecurities you feel:

1. That I don't fit in.
2. That if I say the wrong thing, I'll destroy relationships.
3. That I'm not safe.

3 talents/skills you wish you had:

1. That I was a handygirl and could with ease and confidence build and repair things around the house.
2. That I had the grace of knowing just the right thing to say, especially in emotionally trying situations.
3. That I was a seasoned traveller and could handle airports, driving, new situations and environments with aplomb.

3 things you would do if you had more time:

1. Hang out and do nothing.
2. Create more.
3. Get our house in order and beautiful.

3 things you would do if you had enough money:

1. Build a fabulous new wardrobe of things I love deeply and feel fabulous in.
2. Buy a house in a neighbourhood I'm wild for and in conjunction with a fabulous interior designer and a trustworthy contractor turn it into the house of our dreams complete with art studio, dance studio and coaching office.
3. Start a centre that offers coaching, workshops and experiences to enhance people's lives, support their dreams and self-discovery and build connections and community.

3 things that bring you peace and relaxation:

1. A vacation away, where I don't have access to do any of my "to do" stuff.
2. Going to the spa.
3. Quiet.

3 things that spark your creativity:

1. Conversations with creative people
2. The Universe
3. Being in my body

3 people I'm tagging:

1. Suzie
2. Shannon
3. Frankie

Self Portrait Tuesday ~ Time ~ Week 1

I'm excited about the new Self Portrait Tuesday theme: Time. The request is to submit at least 7 photos that in some way show time passing. I've decided to take a picture every day of something that I appreciate. I love the idea of having an image to capture a special moment of each day.

Tuesday: I appreciated these beautiful postcards from Melba's postcard project. I just smiled ear to ear when I saw them. And look at the special way she's held them together. I'm helping to spread her energy and art by sharing these postcards around. Maybe you'll be lucky enough to find one!

Wednesday: I had a wonderful day coaching. I love being able to work from home. One of the advantages is that I'm able to make myself something yummy, fresh and nutritious for lunch, like this salad.

Thursday: I had the joy of attending the National Ballet of Canada's Balanchine triple bill, which I wrote about at the time. (This is a picture I scanned from their program. Our seats were good, but not quite that good)

Friday: I had lunch with my Mom, which is always a treat. She is awesome company and always has something fascinating that she's thinking about. She was happy to know that she was who I was appreciating that day, hehe.

Saturday: Justin and I had lunch at Cafe Crepe a restaurant in the Queen West hood of Toronto, blocks away from where we used to live. For the past several weeks we've been going on little Saturday excursions together, which is become a tradition I'm quite fond of. I love traditions. If I like something and have the pleasure of doing it twice, I consider it tradition. If you ever go here, it's the Nutella crepe that is an absolute must.

Sunday: was all about Oscar, of course. I left my picks to the very last minute and absolutely surprised myself by guessing, I mean predicting 14 of the 24 winners! The Academy Awards are a big deal around here, so we made a delicious steak dinner and Shannon blessed us with her stuffed mushrooms. Yum!

Monday: One of the best parts of the day was having a big cuddle with Shannon's cat, Gobo. He is such a sweetie, just the gentlest cat I've ever met, ever. He's a purr machine and a love muffin. Nothing like cat kisses and purrs to make your Monday sweeter.

I wonder what next week will bring.

101 Things in 1001 days

It's official. Today I begin the 101 Things in 1001 Days adventure! I have to tell you it was hard to come up with my list. I wanted to create a list that would lead me to December 1, 2008 thinking, wow, I'm so thrilled that I did all of that! I learned so much, I accomplished so much and I experienced so much. I plan on doing regular updates on my progress, assuming that my progress is regular (hehe). Shannon's doing it too. Feel free to join in the fun! What 101 things would you do?

Jamie's 101 Things in 1001 Days
Start date: March 5, 2006
End date: December 1, 2008
Completed tasks: 46

1. Pay off my student loan (completed October 24, 2006)
2. Get my Nia Blue Belt (completed November 9, 2006)
3. In winter, bundle up and have hot chocolate on the deck at midnight
4. Find/create a special place for my journals and photo albums
5. Go to fFida (completed August 18, 2006)
6. Get vent in kitchen taken care of (completed December 14, 2006)
7. Run a workshop for young women
8. Create cards
9. Deposit change (Done. Can you believe we had $500? That's now in our travel fund)
10. Do a spa treatment I've never done before
11. Find a mentor (Though really she found me. Completed March 28, 2007)
12. Go on a nature walk
13. Finish 2 kitchen windows (completed June 2, 2006)
14. Get a pair of rubber boots and go for a walk in the rain (completed July 21, 2008)
15. Go horseback riding
16. Have a meaningful conversation with my Dad (completed August 9, 2006 - amazing)
17. Invite people over for a meal 6 times, starting with Mom (6/6 complete. Mom over for dinner April 16, 2006, Beth, Mom and Shannon over for Easter April 8, 2007, Mom & Shannon for Christmas dinner, my Father-in-Law Jan 8, 2008, Mom & Shannon Jan 26, 2008)
18. Leave my day job (completed August 15, 2006)
19. Participate in the Take Back the Night Walk
20. Get my charts done (completed January 8, 2007)
21. Create and fill an art journal (completed July 23, 2006)
22. Become a Reiki Master
23. Take 100 Nia classes (completed 38/100)
24. Have my taxes up to date (completed August 31, 2006)
25. Take my vitamins every day for a month (completed April 20, 2006)
26. Go for a high tea
27. FOH lighting working (completed December 11, 2006)
28. Take a tai chi class
29. Go on a spa retreat
30. Send Justin a present at work
31. Create bookmarks
32. No bare bulbs on the main floor or upstairs (in process - only 3 lights left to do)
33. Go to 10 new restaurants (complete: Cafe Luxembourg, La Brouette, Simon's Wok, Urban Thai Bistro, The Rectory, Jawny Bakers, Grenadier Cafe and Teahouse, 7Numbers, The Artful Dodger, Armadillo Texas Grill)
34. Get my CPR certification (completed March 17, 2006)
35. See fireworks
36. Create and keep a spell/prayer/magic book (completed July 23, 2006. Combined with #21)
37. Get new glasses (completed June 29, 2006)
38. Throw a party
39. Get front of house painted
40. Send 3 spontaneous gifts (1/3 sent)
41. Plant a tree (completed April 4, 2006 - counting the Mock Orange as a tree)
42. Go vegetarian for a week (January 1-8, 2007)
43. Get Aveda conditioner (completed April 20, 2006)
44. Have an article published
45. Take a session with an Alexander Technique Practitioner
46. Have the driveway done
47. Run a special event
48. Try a trapeze
49. Be TV-free for a week
50. Go into a store that intimidates me (completed November 1, 2006)
51. Run a collage workshop (completed Jan 13, 2008)
52. Make piragi (completed Boxing Day 2006)
53. Go to a comedy show (Jan 18, 2008)
54. Go computer-free for a weekend (Completed Oct 13 & 14)
55. Go to the zoo
56. Participate in a spiritual ritual (completed October 26, 2006 for Samhain)
57. Join a networking group
58. Pay monthly bills through my own business income (completed Sept 30, 2006)
59. Become a certified co-active coach (completed April 18, 2006)
60. Replace the front door
61. Play Bingo
62. Put together 1 awesome outfit for each season (in progress: 1/4 completed: fall 2006)
63. Read all nominated books for the Giller Prize 2006 (in progress, Bloodletting & Miraculous Cures read, DeNiro's Game read, read The Perfect Circle)
64. Throw a dance party
65. Go to Punta Cana (cancelled)
66. Run a celebration workshop (in progress, booked to give Celebration workshop at JustBe... Connected in 2007 - cancelled)
67. Replace coffee and end tables (Completed December 2007.)
68. Fingerpaint (completed August 23, 2006)
69. Go to a movie by myself on a weekday afternoon (Completed August 24, 2006)
70. Speak at an event
71. Watch the sunrise
72. Make breakfast cookies
73. Send 100 appreciation notes (completed 24/100)
74. Take a puppetry class
75. Run an "on your own path" group
76. Take the cats to the vet (completed March 10, 2006)
77. Visit Suzie
78. Take a class with Justin (completed March 17, 2007)
79. Go to 3 Toronto public gardens or parks (completed 2/3, went to the Toronto Music Garden and High Park)
80. Go to an outdoor Shakespeare performance
81. Throw an art activity party
82. Work through Pencil Dancing
83. Go for an early morning walk in my neighbourhood
84. Try reflexology
85. Teach a Nia class (complete May 10, 2007)
86. Watch all unwatched movies or give them away
87. Go to Old Montreal with Justin
88. Get window coverings in kitchen (in progress, blinds bought July 5, 2007 and one has been put up. Though that does officially count, I'm going to wait until their up before calling this complete. Second blind is up Nov 18, 2007. )
89. Take a Feldenkrais class (completed December 2, 2006)
90. Make a piece of art and hang it in the living room
91. Get moisturizer from aesthetician (completed April 13, 2006)
92. Visit Jason
93. Find 7 new allies (completed April 7, 2006)
94. Volunteer for an event
95. See a Soulpepper show (completed August 19, 2006)
96. Go to the AGO by myself
97. Take a class at OCAD
98. Get a thai yoga massage (completed August 9, 2006)
99. Go hot-air ballooning
100. Take an expressive arts workshop (completed February 24, 2006)
101. Give myself 15 minutes of chair-and-stare time a day for a month (completed April 22, 2006)

Shared Experience

I only have brief moments to write today. I haven't had a chance to do my Inspire Me Thursday contribution because last night my husband and I went to the ballet - Yay!! For our wedding anniversary this year we decided we were going to create some shared experiences. We bought tickets for the Balanchine Triple Bill put on by the National Ballet of Canada. It was such a treat. I haven't been to the ballet for years. When I was in high school, my mom used to write me a note so that I could leave school and go to Thursday matinees at the ballet with my friend Suzy. I have so many fond memories of watching up-and-coming dancers perform the great ballets. It was a beautiful way to spend a Thursday afternoon and now a Thursday night!

5 Food Challenges & 101 Things

Thank you, Meg for tagging me for 5 Food Challenges. I've enjoyed thinking about food and my relationship to it. There are foods I am wild about: raspberries, pineapple, a good Ontario peach in August, a homemade smoothie on a hot day, a cold beer after a long day, a glass of red wine in winter, coffee in the morning, tea at night, ackee & cod, turkey at Christmas, piragi at Easter, milk chocolate, homemade waffles, popcorn, the list goes on and on. And there's food that I'll stay away from: shellfish, pudding, oatmeal, veal, lamb, squid, oysters. Pretty much anything mushy is a no-go with me.

What I most associate with food is celebrations, special occasions and the way food makes moments memorable. I think of long family dinners with lots of conversation. I think about holidays and birthdays and romantic celebrations. I think about my husband cooking me a meal, which was way out of his comfort zone. I think of making waffles with my bridesmaids on the morning of my wedding. I think of the moment I realized it's difficult to eat salad gracefully, even on a first date. I think of picking up sandwiches at St. Patrick's to smuggle into the movies. I think of Pub Night at the Bishop. I think of greasy spoon breakfasts (bacon [crisp], eggs [scrambled], coffee, toast, homefries) at the Coral Reef, People's, KOS and Stem. I think of all the restaurants that have become invested with our memories.

The picture today is of one of our favourite restaurant's in Toronto, Kalendar. This is from the night of our second wedding anniversary. We've also celebrated birthdays here and enjoyed many brunches and outings when we lived around the corner in the wonderful College West neighbourhood of Toronto. They have absolutely the best coffee in the city. Every place we've lived, I can think of the neighbourhood spots we frequented. When we were looking for our first house, we wouldn't buy one unless there was a place to pop out to dinner nearby.

I've really enjoyed thinking about this challenge and have decided to incorporate it into something fun that my sister Shannon and I have decided to participate in: 101 Things in 1001 Days. Check it out and see if you might want to participate too. We'll be launching our adventures on March 5, giving us an end date of December 1, 2008. And here are my challenges:

Jamie's 5 Food Challenges
(a subsection of Jamie's 101 Things in 1001 Days)

1. Try at least 10 new restaurants.
2. Invite at least 6 people over for dinner, starting with my Mom.
3. Go vegetarian for a week.
4. Make a cheesecake.
5. Make Latvian piragi. If you don't know what this is, there's great directions (complete with pictures) here.

Tag, you're it...

And I am tagging Suzie Shannon and Dan.